Fran, Adam, Fran, Laura, & Kathy

Having two moms was just our life, so there was nothing unusual about it. Laura (we called her “Bubs”) would pick us up, feed us dinner, and take us out. It just never seemed different to us because that was our family.

Adam: When I was in third grade, I joined the Boy Scouts. I was super excited. I didn’t understand why Bubs couldn’t be a Den Leader. There were all kinds of special permissions we had to have granted because she wasn’t one of the dads in the Den. I used to get pressured by the dad who ran the troop, “Don’t you want your dad to come to this?” I would say that I wanted Bubs to come.  Bubs is the cool one.

Fran: For me, I feel like I went from a single-mom experience to a full-family experience when our moms got together. I went from having one parent who worked a lot, to having two parents at home cooking dinner, going on outings, and taking vacations.  I think a lot of people who become parents think, “What is it that I am missing? What experiences can I provide for my kids by making this choice, or that choice?” I feel like with same-sex relationships a lot of people are on the outside looking in, judging and saying that same-sex partnerships aren’t providing certain things.

Fran: Our moms split up when I was a teenager and Bubs moved out. Bubs’ new partner, Kathy, became our stepmother. I was able to split my time between Bubs at her home and my other mom at my other home. I felt supported by all three women and they helped guide me through my teen years. I got more out of my life having more people in my family.

These bonds are not momentary. They’re not fleeting. It’s just like with anyone who falls in love, has children, has a life, or creates a life with someone else. It’s colorless. It’s gender-less. It’s pure emotion.