Cameo, Pat, & Ciera

L to R: Ciera, Pat, Cameo

From the beginning, Ciera was a tomboy. She liked army men, cars, and skateboarding. As her mom, I had wanted a girly girl I could dress up, but she wasn’t comfortable like that. I didn’t question her about it. I started to notice certain things about Ciera before she was even aware of it.

I always made an environment for Ciera where she could come to me and talk about anything. I raised her not to see color and to accept the differences in people. She has this cornucopia of diverse friends and they are always allowed to come to the house and hang out.

Her grandma and I knew she was a little different when she got to be older and she was always nervous around certain girls. We tried to send her the message that we were fine with whoever she was as long as she was happy. We didn’t want her to be ashamed of who she was.

When your children or grandchildren first tell you they are gay, you have all of these questions. You want to know if you did something to make them gay, or maybe you didn’t do something and that made them gay. You finally come to acceptance and the conclusion that no matter what, your love for that child is still strong.

She has always been this amazing young lady; she graduated from college and she’s in journalism. We see the love and creativity in her and we see her need to be loved. She works so hard to please people and we hope that never goes away.

There needs to be more connections for parents and grandparents of lesbian and gay people so that they can support each other and go through these journeys together.